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Top 5 Ridiculously Unnessicary Apps for your iPhone
#5
Name: myLite Flashlight and Coloured Strobe
Price: Free
What It Does (Developer Description: Rock concerts will never be the same with the myLite Color Flashlight by DoApp. Going clubbing and wanna be hip? Whip out the myLite -- the chicks dig it and the guys will scream out, "whoa, dude!" Need a flashing light for an emergency signal? The myLite does it all and more making it the most versatile flashlight and strobe light for the iPhone.
What It Really Does: In panic-alarm style nonsense, the myLite Flashlight and Coloured Strobe seems to only have two things on it's agenda: to give you a seizure... and to get you beat up. With different settings such as "normal" "strobe" "Trippin" and "Concert", this application is as useless as it is a sure fire way to get your iPhone curb stomped. I'm entirely serious. I can see MAYBE how the "normal" setting could help, a bright white light in pitch blackness may help you guide your way... maybe... but the "strobe" setting is obnoxious at best, medically hazardous at worst. The absolute worst setting on this application is "concert", and I'd like you to know flat out that I am not even kidding about this... setting the application to "rock concert" brings up an image of a lighter. WARNING: The first person I see at a concert holding up their iPhone with their myLite Flashlight and Coloured Strobe application in full swing is going to get their phone stolen and stomped on.
Why We Want It: May or may not be comical to flash the bright yellow/white strobes in the pitch black and scare the crap out of someone.
Time Wasted: 3 minutes, also known as "the longest that my retinas could stand it."
#4:
Name: More Cowbell
Price: Free
What It Does (Developer Description): This app does one thing, but it does it well- it lets you have more cowbell.
What It Actually Does: Tapping the screen on the graphic of the cowbell... in fact makes a cowbell sound.
Why We Want It: If only to play along to Blue Oyster Cult songs and giggle.
Time Wasted: 10 minutes
#3:
Name: BubbleWrap
Price: Free
What It Does (Developer Description): Pop the virtual bubbles as fast as you can. How many can you do before the timer runs out? Beware that bubbles may re-inflate and some bubbles may not be as they appear.
What It Actually Does: Sucks your precious time away from you like a cruel bitch mother. I am completely serious, once you start playing with BubbleWrap, every free moment you have will be spent tapping your freakin iPhone, each little pop of the faux bubble wrap sucking a bit of your broken soul out through your finger tip.
Why We Want It: Because it's freakin awesome. I could say something like frustration relief, or some other excuse to make me feel better about it... but the fact remains: ...I just like bubble wrap.
Time Wasted: I've logged about 3 hours on it so far...
#2:
Name: Labyrinth Lite Edition
Price: Free
What It Does (Developer Description): The classic labyrinth game where you control a steel ball by tilting a wooden labyrinth. This is the Lite Edition with 10 fully playable levels.
What It Actually Does: Sucks up so many hours of your free time your boyfriend or girlfriend will think you're cheating on them. It's exactly like the old game, and the tilt sensitivity is phenomenally accurate!
Why We Want It: Because I'm a dweeb and I used to play this game (the actually wooden one) for hours on end when I was a kid!
Time Wasted: 20 Minutes waiting for the bus, 30 minute bus ride, 10 second elevator ride, 4 hour physics class... what? I kid. Honestly? I'm playing with this thing in all of my spare time. All the time.
#1:
Name: Knots
Price: Free
What It Does (Developer Description): Tie your fingers in knots with this simple, fun game. Touch and release the spots and they appear and disappear... and keep extra fingers at the ready!
What It Actually Does: Makes you go cross-eyed after playing for a bit, but more-over: it's FINGER TWISTER! For play with one or two people, it's perhaps the most excellent iPhone/iPod game I've ever found. You should definitely try to have a solid surface to set the devise on before you play or else you're going to lose a whole lot.
Why We Want It: FINGER. TWISTER.
Time Wasted: 1 Hour
BONUS:
Name: Virtual Zippo Lighter
Price: Free
What It Does (Developer Description): The Virtual Zippo Lighter opens with a flick of your wrist and lights with a turn of your thumb. The windproof flame sways as you move your iPhone. Choose from a selection of Zippo Lighter images.
What It Actually Does: Honest to got, that's all it does. You flick the cap open with your thumb... you flick the flint, and voila... virtual fire.
Why We Want It: Because unlike the virtual lighter in myLite Flashlight and Coloured Strobe, this is just too plain ridiculous and pointless of an application to pass up.
Time Wasted: ...I'm ashamed to admit the time that I've logged flicking the Zippo.
