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My Respect, Let Me Show You It
On my month-long trip to California and back, I attended a concert in Agoura Hills, CA with Sound Faction BFFs Katie and Travis. What was the show in question? The lineup was Candygram for Mongo, Black Gold, The Young Veins and Rooney. It was a great show, and we enjoyed all of it (for many reasons. See the review section coming soon for more info). After the show, I decided a photo of Katie, Travis and Ryan Ross (of The Young Veins) would be a great keepsake to remember the night by, and I approached the singer casually and stuck my hand out for a handshake and courteously asked: "Excuse me, Mr. Ross... would it be all right if I got a photograph of you and my friends?" And do you know what happened? Do you?
He laughed.
That's right, the moment the words "Mr. Ross" were out of my mouth, he laughed at me. we took the picture and moved on, but that stuck with me. Why did he laugh? My whole life I have been raised that adults (even if they're younger than I am) deserve to be treated with respect, which includes the use of Mr. Mrs. or Ms. If you are an adult and we aren't personal friends you can bet that the first time I speak to you, I'll be using Mr. Mrs. Ms. and your last name. So although I know that Mr. Ross' first name is Ryan, he and I are not friends, nor had we ever met at all, so who am I to call him Ryan like we're friends?
I didn't understand why it bothered me at first that he laughed... i didn't even really understand why he laughed at all, but I couldn't get it out of my mind, that little itch that kept coming back and I literally lost sleep over it (I'm odd like that). Finally it dawned on me a few reasons why he may have laughed.
Reason 1: He's twenty-three years old. I'm twenty-five years old.
Reason 2: I have stupid hair, and his laughter in fact was spawned by my stupid mohawk.
Reason 3: His family policy wasn't scrict about formally addressing adults.
Reason 4: I am not a screaming 15 year old girl hanging off his arm and making a damned fool out of myself.
Reason 5: all of the above.
I'm going with #5. So I am here to talk to you, screaming 15 year old girls (and boys) making giant idiots out of yourself. During the show we heard no less than five teenage girls making wildly innapropriate conversation about the horrifyingly illegal things they wanted Mr. Ross to do to them. It was honestly disgusting... no class at all! Now I understand that you're fifteen years old, and your hormones are out of control, but screaming to an adult that's not even six feet away from you about how you'd like to copulate with him (I'm cleaning it up severely for you, dear readers... because vulgarity is gross), is horrifying and sad.
So let's try something like this. Instead of saying, "ZOMG RYAN I LOVE YOU I WANT YOU TO !@@#$% *&@%$ !$@#* !*@$ MY !@%#@& $#@#%*@ ON TUESDAYS!" try something along the lines of: "Mr. Ross, that song you played was awesome, I really enjoyed it!" (This theory of conversation is applied to all arenas of life, not simply conversation with Ryan Ross.)
Let's try one more. Instead of "OMGOMGOMGOMG RYAN YOU'RE THE BEST AND THE HOTTEST GUY EVER EVER EVER OMGOMGOMG I LOVE YOU OMG!" try: "It's a pleasure to meet you, I've been a big fan for a long time. I really like the chorus on (insert favorite song here)".
I gaurentee that if you approach Mr. Ross (or anyone) with a handshake and polite conversation, that you will be more likely to actually talk to him/her for a few moments rather than making a fool out of yourself, and having him/her run away in apt horror.
So there it is, I've worked through the laughter on my own, and even though he thought it was apparently funny, I will continue to be ever polite and respectful to any and all adults (be they musicians or my UPS guy), because as strange as it sounds, you make more friends and have better conversations being a polite and well spoken person, than a clamoring idiot.
He laughed.
That's right, the moment the words "Mr. Ross" were out of my mouth, he laughed at me. we took the picture and moved on, but that stuck with me. Why did he laugh? My whole life I have been raised that adults (even if they're younger than I am) deserve to be treated with respect, which includes the use of Mr. Mrs. or Ms. If you are an adult and we aren't personal friends you can bet that the first time I speak to you, I'll be using Mr. Mrs. Ms. and your last name. So although I know that Mr. Ross' first name is Ryan, he and I are not friends, nor had we ever met at all, so who am I to call him Ryan like we're friends?
I didn't understand why it bothered me at first that he laughed... i didn't even really understand why he laughed at all, but I couldn't get it out of my mind, that little itch that kept coming back and I literally lost sleep over it (I'm odd like that). Finally it dawned on me a few reasons why he may have laughed.
Reason 1: He's twenty-three years old. I'm twenty-five years old.
Reason 2: I have stupid hair, and his laughter in fact was spawned by my stupid mohawk.
Reason 3: His family policy wasn't scrict about formally addressing adults.
Reason 4: I am not a screaming 15 year old girl hanging off his arm and making a damned fool out of myself.
Reason 5: all of the above.
I'm going with #5. So I am here to talk to you, screaming 15 year old girls (and boys) making giant idiots out of yourself. During the show we heard no less than five teenage girls making wildly innapropriate conversation about the horrifyingly illegal things they wanted Mr. Ross to do to them. It was honestly disgusting... no class at all! Now I understand that you're fifteen years old, and your hormones are out of control, but screaming to an adult that's not even six feet away from you about how you'd like to copulate with him (I'm cleaning it up severely for you, dear readers... because vulgarity is gross), is horrifying and sad.
So let's try something like this. Instead of saying, "ZOMG RYAN I LOVE YOU I WANT YOU TO !@@#$% *&@%$ !$@#* !*@$ MY !@%#@& $#@#%*@ ON TUESDAYS!" try something along the lines of: "Mr. Ross, that song you played was awesome, I really enjoyed it!" (This theory of conversation is applied to all arenas of life, not simply conversation with Ryan Ross.)
Let's try one more. Instead of "OMGOMGOMGOMG RYAN YOU'RE THE BEST AND THE HOTTEST GUY EVER EVER EVER OMGOMGOMG I LOVE YOU OMG!" try: "It's a pleasure to meet you, I've been a big fan for a long time. I really like the chorus on (insert favorite song here)".
I gaurentee that if you approach Mr. Ross (or anyone) with a handshake and polite conversation, that you will be more likely to actually talk to him/her for a few moments rather than making a fool out of yourself, and having him/her run away in apt horror.
So there it is, I've worked through the laughter on my own, and even though he thought it was apparently funny, I will continue to be ever polite and respectful to any and all adults (be they musicians or my UPS guy), because as strange as it sounds, you make more friends and have better conversations being a polite and well spoken person, than a clamoring idiot.
ARCHIVE:
My Respect, Let Me Show You It - By Caity
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For One Day Be A Child! - By Natty
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100 Summer Songs for Your Playlist - By Caity
For One Day Be A Child! - By Natty
5-Minute Time Warp with Caity: Pt 1 - By Caity
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Why Does A Six Letter Word Have Such An Impact? - By Natty
